NEW USE FOR WAILING WALL

Multi-purpose sporting facility to divert attention
from terrorist activities

Jerusalem, July 5--In a move that is sure to provoke
controversy, the ruling political body in Jerusalem
has announced that it will convert most of the Wailing
Wall and the adjoining Temple on the Rock mount to a
multi-purpose sporting complex, complete with
volleyball court, multi-gender gym facilities
including jacuzzi, and tennis courts.

Although the move is expected to draw much protest
from both Jewish and Arab groups, most observers
admitted that this was a step in the right direction.

"I can always find a wall to pray on," said Hasidic
Rabbi Alechem Ben-Sclechem. "But where else can I
work on my serve in the presence of a holy shrine?"

Most security forces will be convered to referees and
towel boys in time for the changeover, which is
expected to take place in time for the Holy Days of
2003.